Surprise!

Sometimes you think you know somebody inside out and then they spring a surprise trait on you that you would never have guessed they had. It's nice. Two fishy people have done the 'Surprise' routine back-to-back and I'm quite pleased about it. One lies through his teeth like a professional, the other has a fascination for green because that's the colour of the house she belonged to in school.

You think you know people... The question is, 'How much?'...

Btw... 2 latest stories:
1. A first for Bengali animation
2. Lal Kalo: Going beyond red and black

PS: Made a major goof-up on the review. A small but major one. Thanks to Coffee Stain who corrected me.

Belated Happy Birthday Parcel

My sister's happy birthday parcel is planning to get sent off today. Her birthday is on the 17th. It takes a week or so to reach. Procrastination is my middle name. Call me Poojo Procrastination C. starting today.

Post-Pujo post

The Pujos came, made a lot of festive noise, and it's gone already. For those whose offices were generous enough to give their Kolkatan employees four days off, "You lucky pigs!" For those whose offices didn't, "You poor things."

Surprisingly though, I didn't miss having to spend most of Durga Puja 2008 facing a computer screen. I hated having to be at work while the rest of Kolkata wore new clothes, ate chicken rolls and took photos of the heppest pujas in town... but having had two days off (Navami and Dashami ... one of which is my weekly off anyway and the other a holiday across the country), I feel light and happy and in an I-can-conquer-a-small-world-like-Pluto mood.

I read a wonderful book yesterday: The Boy in the Striped Pajamas by John Boyne. It's the Holocaust again, but from a refreshing, childlike perspective.

Boss bastion

I caught my boss watching Love Guru when he should have been working. Taking advantage of the big boss' being away and having passed most of the work to us, his poor cursed subordinates, he had happily put on his headphones and was watching Guru Pitka impart his copyrighted knowledge to all who will listen. And having seen him watching the movie, I did what I do best -- practice diplomacy by offering him a mini-review of the film.

Being a boss is a good job. You don't have to work. If you're sincere, you just make a show of doing a lot of work. And that's all you need.

Sometime ago this same boss had dozed off, with his head half under the monitor. Us giggly subordinates had tiptoed all the way to his work station to check out the scene.

And he's not the only one. Soon after this dozing off session, we spotted the big boss with his head down on his table. A colleague went over to ask him something, and he raised his head, eyes red with sleep. Of course, this boss works kinda hard, so a nap is forgivable in this case.

There's this other loudmouth senior chap in the office. Thankfully, he isn't our boss and belongs to a different department. Now this guy is something to see, and hard to miss with his protruding belly and loudspeaker-like voice. And all he does throughout the 9-hour work day is read the New York Times website, advise people on everything around the sun, ask over-worked people unnecessary general knowledge questions till they are out of polite answers just so he can show the world how much he knows, and show off the photos he has taken with his 80k-rupee DSLR and posted on his blog just so you have the wonderful opportunity to praise his creativity.

As I was saying, being a boss has many, many perks. Sometimes I feel I'm stuck in the wrong job. I should be a boss too.

Saturday night fever

is not a good thing. Especially not when you also have a runny nose and sweaty palms and a full working day to take care of. Have been feeling pretty darn sorry for myself all of today. And missing my Mommy also. It's funny how you end up missing Mommy most of all when you're sick. It's nice to be mollycoddled sometimes.

My hottest gal pal and I have decided that we've finally met a true-blue bitch... and while we don't exactly dislike her... it's exciting to finally have one of those types in our list of 'People I've Met'. (No, I haven't put that list together just yet, but it just might be time).

Being cryptic on this blog gets harder and harder every single day given that everyone seems to chatting with everyone else. It's a burden I tell you, especially for us folks who keep everyone in the loop about everything all of the time. See, I'm a quiet fellow... but even I need to do something to fill up those awkward silences. Life is tough sometimes. And complicated.

And I have a cold. And inside-inside fever. Please feel sorry for me.

Black & white and weddings

Black and white movies are really not my thing, but fairy tales are. And as far as fairy tales go, it's hard to beat a Cinderella story -- no matter which era it is set in, it touches a chord.

Audrey Hepburn was the Cinderella in this movie with Humphrey Bogart playing her Prince Charming. Personally, I think he makes a rather ugly Prince Charming. I preferred the guy playing his brother (who originally got the hots for Audrey -- the good ol' love triangle to bring in the twist).

Everybody around me seems to be on the brink of marriage these days. Chomu from school and Chandannagore from work are the latest victims. The first dude has had his parents and her parents set the date for the wedding but hasn't popped the question yet. The diamond ring is yet to be bought. The second dude has spoken to wifey-to-be over the phone over the last two days and seems very very giddy and blushy about it. It's kinda cute to see a guy go all red in the face talking about his wedding.

No wedding bells for me in the very near future, though there was this joke in office about my getting hitched that a certain much-liked intern and my boss fell for. It was all very funny till it seemed like one too many people know. But I did discover that the two ladies who sit beside me at work, love to overact when it comes to pulling the wool over other people's eyes (or spectacles). The fool-your-colleague questions I had to answer included:

• Is the boy's brother coming down from the States?
• How is the mom-in-law?
• When are you going jewellery shopping?
• Will you be buying gold? (If you don't like gold, go in for rodium-polished jewellery)

I don't have enough money or time to get married just now. And the whole shopping bonanza thing and crowds of unknown, smiling, judgemental faces gives me nausea. So I'll just go to other people's weddings and eat like a pink pig for the time being.

Old but still kicking

I feel old and washed out and permanently stressed these days. The grey hair population is increasing by the minute (the silver strands actually sparkle after a shampoo) while the grey cells are getting worn out every hour of every day. I need a break from everything. I need a day when time would just stop.

STOP.

Nice word that. A pause during non-stop activity. Just press the button that looks like this:

II

And you have time to think things over, wonder, maybe just get a glass of water.

Life has suddenly become really hectic. My guitar lies unopened waiting for me to get some time to myself. And I don't mean free time to watch TV. Just time for me to be with me.

Me-time has become such a luxury. And it doesn't help that I have this huge list of things to do and feel guilty 'cause I don't end up doing most of them on any given day. I need a planner. I sure do.

I also need a computer chair. I read somewhere that 'backache is the new headache' -- and that sure seems to be the case. No matter what I do, my spine makes me feel like I belong to the paleolithic period.

I don't wish I could turn back time. Though I wouldn't mind being in a real-life Kate and Leopold thingy. But I just want a break. From everything and everyone. Almost everyone.

I'd like to see a rainbow. I'd seen one once upon a time, after a rough month while walking to the bus stop. For 15 minutes it was right there, the whole rainbow looking straight at me... end to end.

Sometimes you just know that there are angels watching over you. This was one of those sometimes.

There was another time when this star kept peeping at me through overcast skies while I stared back. This was during the height of the Mumbai monsoons, and the star kept twinkling till I felt all was right with the world again. Then it immediately pulled the disappearing act and hid behind the clouds. But my yellowish toothy smile had returned by then.

I'd like something like that one of these days. But I do feel better now -- how many people manage to walk towards a rainbow for 15 whole minutes?? And on the bright side, the internet is working today -- it had taken the day off last night.

My sister has been sitting in front of the TV and incessantly watching Disney Channel ever since she reached the US. My cats and dogs sleep, eat, take a walk, play with each other, eat, sleep, seek petting, eat, sleep all day through. My eldest cat Thomas in fact does away with most of the other activities and eats, sleeps, seeks petting, eats, sleeps all the time.

Being able to do nothing is a precious gift. If you have it, I envy and admire you. Plus, I don't know if any of that spare time will rub off... but do look at these poor lil puppy dog eyes.

Day 70

Three-fifths of immediate family off to Chicago right now. Here is a picture of one of the three that got away.


I be missing her much already, especially when I turn on Disney Channel and the ad for 'Magical Do Re Mi' appears.

Day 69

Changes all over the place. Good, not-so-good, lovely -- sometimes you wish the world would just go away.

Ma, sis, and sis are off to the US tomorrow. For good. I am whoa!-man of the house now and being made to shift upstairs to keep the cats company.

Lunch today at Tamarind was lovely. Very very nice.

Busy day tomorrow. Airport trip in the pipeline. 6+ big bags and a Tata Sumo are part of the picture.

A lil preoccupied.

Day 68

I've been nasty all evening. I can crib but I won't. Now I feel happier. Bubblier. But in no mood to post. Yes. I have become lazy. Apologies. I will be back tomorrow with a better post.

Some food thoughts:

The Electric Nimbu Kurkure Extreme is super strong, sour and intense. But too much of it will have your teeth grating. Happened to me last night.

This place near office serves amazing biriyani. That's what I had for lunch today. Shreya ordered a phirni that she didn't like coz it didn't taste like phirni. I liked the phirni for the same reason -- it tasted like mishti doi.

At the above place (Aaleya), I rattled off the order like I'd been doing it all my life -- no breaths in between, not a pause, and not a single fumble. I was impressed, as were my colleagues. An alternative career beckons this reluctant journo. Being a waiter in a good-food restaurant should fit my stomach well.

Mocambo was next on the list of eat-out places. And I not happy with it. Too little food for too much price.

Day 64

One long off-day this.

Was woken up by call from boss who wanted to send me to a movie premiere, which I agreed to go to, but later realized coming back would be a problem. So from 7 to 10 I vegged out in front of the TV and then the computer. Finished watching What happened in Vegas. It has Ashton Krutcher and Cameroon Diaz in the lead.

The day began with a hilarious dream involving Madz, me and Rishi. Here it comes:

Madz and I were going around the city in a cab in search of a loo. This was at night, and by the time we found Rishi, it was morning. Luckily, he found us a loo. Smelly, dirty, and you had to queue up to use it, but a loo is a loo is a loo after all. Funnily enough, this 50-yr-old-ish Bong lady and her husband who were obviously travelling, were trying to drag their humongous, black VIP suitcase into that tiny, smelly loo -- for fear of theft we assumed.

After our loo trip, Rishi could not be found. As it turns out, he was standing atop a concrete structure which consisted of several flights of stairs leading to nowhere. Imagine a car park in a mall where there is no place to park, just a path to go up or down. Kinda like a concrete suicide point. Of course, Rishi wasn't contemplating suicide; he was enjoying the breeze.

We were tired, Madz and me, so Rishi decided to take us to relax at his place. Importantly, 'his place' was a storeroom in the mall behind the concrete suicide point. Not high enough to stand up straight in, though Moo might just about manage. Surprisingly, the mall management had no idea that our Rishi Roy had moved in to one of their unused storerooms. Plus, it had an attached loo.

Once at Rishi's place, it was time for a movie. Madz made a movie request and headed to the loo. (The loo seems to be the star of this early morning dream) I asked, "Can't we watch Who framed Roger Rabbit?" And Rishi said, "Sure we can, except that Madz has already chosen a movie." "And which movie is this," asked I. And he flipped through some CD covers to show me our movie of the day: Kuch Kuch Hota Hai.

That's pretty much when I woke up, grinning.

Okay, so the dream was much funnier while I was sleeping, but the first thing I promised myself was that I'd record it here. So here you are.

Did meet Madz today. Ma, me, sis and Madz went for lunch together. New Cathay. Coke, fresh lime soda, mixed chowmein (gravy) and chilli chicken, followed by sundaes at Hobby Centre. Then there was juice and puchka (I had just one puchka though). Dinner of aloo-potol bhaja followed, with mishti doi landing up at the fag end of the day.

This is a very long post, and I will stop now, but not before announcing that I finally have my official email ID in place. Yay.

And while you're at it, read this: Oh! Kolkata takes some getting used to (It's by the new English intern at office. She writes pretty darn well if I say so myself. I'm jealous.)

Day 46 (still running a day late)

Yesterday was my surprise birthday party. Organized by mother dear and attended by the following conspirators (in no particular order):
Friends: Madhurima, Shutapa, Jesica, Rishi, Debanuj
Family: Mother, 13-going-on-16 Sister,4-going-on-5 sister,13-year-old's 2 friends and one of their mothers.
Conspicuous by her absence was Shreya Shukla who got held up at work because I had to leave early. She was in effect, finishing my work and couldn't attend my party despite conspiring about it.
Also conspicuous by his absence was Rahul 'Chomu' Kunda who apparently broke his leg and was in hospital. I'm not sure I believe the story. He has a new girlfriend now. I wonder how this one came to pass.

Ploy to get me out of office belonged to the Mother: I was told that there was some legal document that I would be required to sign. I went along unsuspectingly. Late by less than a whisker, but still running late. Mother was dressed up. Surprising, considering we were going to some run-down government building. As I mentioned, we were late, but she still wanted to stop and pet this very cool-looking overweight labrador. I didn't let her: 'We're late. Come along." And then... she wanted to go inside Golden Dragon to book the place for my birthday (which, incidentally, is on June 7, Saturday). She headed for the door. I said, "No. Not now." She dragged me by the hand into that dimly-lit little restaurant, while I struggled to escape. Ma won. I was in. And before my eyes could adjust to the lack of light,

SURPRISE!!

Presenting my Surprise Happy Birthday Party.

What happened next was that a lot of food appeared on the table all of a sudden, and none of us pounced upon it, though the two boys were asked to stuff themselves silly, and they didn't stuff themselves silly. Some of the folks at the table struggled with the food, while others polished it off ASAP and refused to take any more.

My Surprise Happy Birthday Party cake was a white guitar. Apparently, Ma offered to pay for the 24 candles that were needed for my cake. How old am I???

I got a book and a bag from Anjali's friends and a card with a guitar quote that I will find and put up tomorrow. I had planned to put up some birthday pics given that Madz went clickhappy. But since I look horrible in the two that I saw, I will not put them up. If I see one nice photo of me, expect to see it in tomorrow's post.

Day 20

Another day, another lizard. Except that this one was dead -- half-eaten actually -- and we spent a while trying to figure out what this blob of meat was. Very ughs! [Makes puke sounds]. It freaked me out for a bit: Madman, scorpion, garden lizard, again scorpion, dead lizard remains -- all on almost consecutive days. It's got to mean something!

A wise woman, my mother, said, the coming of ants and other biting insects = the enemy is close at hand; the coming of reptiles = the advent of evil. This spate of weird coincidences is being blamed partly on my non-religiousness and partly on the misdeeds of an enemy (identity unknown as of now).

On a less reptilinear topic: It was Ma's b'day today. She opened presents. We went for lunch at BarBQ. Nappy [photo left] was mistaken to be the birthday girl and got not one, but two balloons! It's good to be a kid.

Day 19

Two days away from Day 21, by which time daily-blogging will become a habit - like brushing teeth (though I've been doing that for over 21 years, so it's not quite fair to compare brushing with blogging; even though both start with "B")

Today has been a little-less-boring day. I went shopping for Ma's gift (Read: walked into a store and walked out with two gifts -- one for her; one for me). I re-joined the library I used to go to as a kid. Now I can once again return to reading pulp fiction. At Rs. 30 per book per week, it's quite a good deal. Plus, I generally read fast. And when I know that slow-reading will be costlier, I read faster. Money always talks :D Have brought home John Grisham's The Appeal, which my Boss has been praising for a while now. Btw... have written a post on Eden on the office website. Please go read it and comment. :P

Now to get on with the account of today:

To begin with, I woke up quite late which made me crabbity early in the morning. I don't like having to rush. But slow and steady, even if it wins you the race eventually, doesn't ensure that you reach office on time. However, I managed to find a speedier auto and emptier roads than usual and reached office only 15 minutes late. And since I'm usually the first one in, it hardly matters how late I am anyway.

But the exciting bit happened this afternoon. A little background here: My paternal grandfather was a Bengali from Bihar. As a result, I have inherited some khotta tendencies (no offence meant to anybody), like putting both legs up on any chair I find. This includes dining table chairs and computer chairs, even if it's a struggle to have my legs fit there.

Anyway, so I was happily strumming on the keyboard with my feet up on the green chair that creaks like the door of a haunted house. I happened to look down to see if my shoes were still there (I am paranoid about my things getting robbed from right under my nose), when I see this grey bit of paper that looks like a lizard. Look a little closer, ask colleague to take a look, and the verdict: it's not a bit of paper disguised as a lizard; it's a lizard.

A prod at the lizard from colleague, and lizard moves. I squeal and rush off in a bid to maintain safe distance. Whole office gets together to chase lizard out away from my CPU. Boss wonders in amusement: Why does the whole office have to be involved in chasing a silly lizard?

But ah! Seated on the other side of the room, how would he know that this is no regular lizard. This is a tree lizard that lifts its head like a snake and hops-skips-and-jumps rather than walk like our civilized house lizards. It is better-looking though, this lizard that temporarily ousted me from my desk and motivated me to keep my feet up on the safety of the chair for the remainder of the afternoon.

Of course, the colleague that looks like and eats like Jughead Jones (minus the hat) managed to collect Lizzy dear on a newspaper and deposit him outside, but the colleague who brings biscuits every morning said that Lizzy was deposited in such a place that made it easier for him to return to the warmth of my CPU. This means more squeals and office disruptions are likely in the near future.

Later this evening though a scorpion emerged from the pot in the bathroom. I had seen him a few days ago and flushed him down. But this water-lover survived the waterfall and came back up today. But by doing this, he also sounded his death knell, for he was crushed into two and flushed down again.

A lizard, a scorpion, and a mad man the other day -- is the universe trying to tell me something??

Day 15

I'd usually be the first one to say I'm fickle, but I sometimes forget that I'm pretty steadfast as well. I know what I like/dislike, love/hate, can-live-with/would-hate-to-live-with, and so on. And I know what I'd like to do in the long run -- write. And that's what I'm doing now. Okay, so my so-called writing job currently involves not too much writing, but that's just a temporary affair. But at least I know what I want to be doing 5, even 10 years from now. It may be a vague notion, but vague is better than no notion. So many of the people I meet everyday aren't even sure what they want to do tomorrow. They just drift along, going from one unrelated job another, all the while dreaming of something entirely different.

I always thought that that's what I was -- a drifter. But as it turns out, I'm not. It's so cool to finally think of myself as being a focussed femme. Years of flakiness had me thinking that I would always be a flake. Maybe not :)

I'm happy with myself today. I feel smart, strong and independent.

I likes :)

P.S.: I'm going back to the vow I made last year around this time: No boyfriend for the next 6 months!

Day 11

And today is the day I post a pic I took all by myself with my new (but secondhand and I got it cheap) 5mp Nikon camera :D

It is a very stupid picture. But you are not allowed to say terrible things about it. As in, I can't do much even if you do say horrible things. But then "Beware of Dog" signs don't always work.

Anyway, without much ado, here it is:

Meet the stuffed Mummy tiger with Baby tiger that sits on my bed day after day staring at the wall. It must be a very boring existence, but mother and son don't complain. Not even when I use 'em as a pillow. I did that for a few weeks till I got a new pillow. Incidentally, this tiger duo that shouts "Hug me" belongs to my sister; as does the book that lies stylishly strewn (:D) next to Tiggey dear. If you'll look closely, you'll find that it is a Full House book with Stephanie and one of the Olsen twins (before they became anorexic glam dolls) on the cover.

***

Today I came home by tram. It took me fifteen minutes more than if I had taken an auto. I also realised that I mind travelling that slow. But the interesting thing is that if you are not looking outta the window, you may not even notice that the tram is taking a turn. Quite a different ball game from an auto ride where you run the risk of falling out if the driver decides to suddenly turn into a super-narrow lane off Royd Street.

***

The people in my office have never had banana chips, which I think is pretty weird.

***

Day 7

Just a short one today. Very tired. Had office. A lot of ups and downs (commute-wise, not emotion-wise). Went to Eden. Watched match. Knight Riders won. Thankee all for praying for their success. Met Coffee Stain who tagged along and was quite a hit.Drank lots of water, and perspired it all away. Have lost most of the unwanted flab. Am fitting into my old tees again. Yay! Ate biriyani. Washed off all the sweat. And now I don't want to sleep but my eyes are drooping like Sanjay Dutt's. Review of Eden etc later.

Flip Flop Flop Flip

I have been doing so many mental flipflops over this last one month that I am fed up of myself. Thankfully, I don't trouble everybody else with these one-day-this, one-day-that thoughts of mine, or they too would get fed up of me!

Sugar on My Bread

My dog Sugar wakes up at 5 every morning and goes bonkers on a regular basis. While my other two dogs lie around stretching and peering through still-sleepy eyes, Sugar is already on the run, racing at top speed from bedroom to dining&drawing room to second bedroom back to dining&drawing room to first bedroom and back again. This carries on for awhile with Sugar doing the Licky-Licky exercise where she pokes her cold, wet nose inside blankets and covers, finds a face and goes lick-lick-lick, till the face hiding under the blankets and covers tries (in vain) to push Sugar away. This only acts as a further spur to Her Great Lickiness, and the lick-lick-lick continues till the victim (yours truly) decides enough is enough and shouts in a voice dripping with annoyance and helpless irritation: SUGAR!!! GO AWAY!

She generally does go away with her tail between her legs after encountering such an outburst, but by the next day she is back once again, her tail moving like a helicopter's propellor as she focusses on the Licky-Licky exercise to awaken the world (read: ME).

First Post for the Year

I just got an Airtel message telling me that it is Hrithik Roshan's birthday tomorrow, so if I want to wish him, Airtel will be happy to pass on my birthday wishes. All balderwash and blabberwocky!

And thus I begin my first post of the new year.

2008 did not arrive on time for me. I spent my 31st moping around and feeling sorry for myself. 1st Jan, 2008, I had a hangover from all that depression. I didn't want the new year to arrive just yet. I wasn't exactly ready. All I wanted was to bury my head in the sand like an ostrich and live in a make-believe world of comfort and security. But Depression does not last long with me. Neither of us like each other, and the gloominess had already overstayed its welcome in my life by a week. The fears remained, but they moved off into the locked attic of my mind with only a threat to resurface later. I could live with that, and by 2nd Jan, 2008, I felt better, lighter, happier. My new year arrived a day late, but it did arrive. Indian Standard Time you see.

I went out on 31st afternoon. Met up with a friend. Shreya. She's supposed to be my soulmate by birth according to this gigantic horoscope book that Ma got as a present a few years back. None of my boyfriends/crushes/almost-boyfriends featured on my list of soulmates. Anyway, Shreya and I went to the Cha-bar at the Oxford bookstore on Park Street. We drank tea, grumbled about our unfocussed, meandering lives, got depressed, envied the stability in other people's lives, got even more depressed, stared at some weirdly dressed people, got really depressed, toyed with the idea of travel journalism, planned a shoestring-budget trip, got happier, and departed on a smilier note with a Happy New Year in advance. Then I came home and moped. Sigh. Such is life.

My new year's resolution is to chat (not necessarily and preferably not online) with at least one new person every day. I know that isn't going to happen, but it's the 9th today, and I've already managed three. Pretty good by my own unsocial standards.

I bought a new diary by the way. That is one of the reasons why I have not been blogging like a maniac. Instead, I've been rambling for 4 pages at a time in my new-found possession.

Speaking of possessions, I also bought a sweater after grumbling that I'm broke (I'm not really... but that's hush-hush information) and pretending to shiver in the cold (irrespective of what Kolkatans claim, this winter was not all that cold! I managed through it with a windcheater and a shawl. And I never wore both at the same time.) The sad thing is that winter '07-'08 is on its way out, and my chic new sweater is going to have to rough it out in the cupboard for at least another 12 months. What a pity :(

My littlest sister just got 7 whacks from me for emptying a whole bottle of chocolate milk on to my mattress. She didn't drop it by mistake. She opened the bottle, turned it over, and emptied every last drop. Now she's punished and staring at the wall. Between you and me, she doesn't look sorry at all. In fact, she's standing there and grinning her happiest smile at me. All this, after 7 whacks!

My best friend's brother is pushing her to get engaged to her boyfriend this year. He's probably just bored that all his friends have got married already. She's the closest he can bully about marriage now.

My own first cousin is getting married in Feb to a guy she has been dating for 8 years. I went over to her place to check out her trousseau, and even though I did nothing but look as she opened trunks and suitcases of clothes, cosmetics, toiletries, gifts, and the like, it was very tiring. I was yawning like a sleep-deprived hippopotamus even before thirty minutes had passed. I dread dressing up. It seems like such a waste of time. At my wedding I'm wearing pajamas. The groom and guests can dress up however they like (Disclaimer: Nudity and obscenity will not be approved of).

My ex-bf is also getting married in Feb. But given that he has given so many versions of his wedding already, nobody is sure as to whether or not he is actually getting married. I'd like to go to the wedding, but I don't think I'll get an invite unless I ask. And I'm not about to ask.

Given that this is wedding season, and there is one in my family, wedding issues are bound to come up in this space. But do not construe my wedding talk to mean that I'm desperate to get married. I'm not; if for no other reason than the idea of having to get all dressed up with silk, satin, and face/war paint. I'm such a bum sometimes.